Pumpkin is having a lot harder time getting around. She's falling a lot more and even crawling/scooting on her bottom some instead of walking. She's also less vocal (with words anyway). I'm assuming this is because she's back on her seizure medicine. As I'm learning, this is the fine dance with seizure meds. You have to find the correct balance of meds to stop the seizures but still allow the child to function. She was also off the meds completely for at least four full days (possibly longer). Her body has to get used to being on them again to begin with.
Last night Pumpkin missed her mommy. She cried and cried at bedtime (for almost an hour). It wasn't a violent cry; but she was so sad. I held her (as much as she would let me anyway) and she just cried. It broke my heart.
The first thing out of Pumpkin's mouth this morning was, "Mommy????"
Today was hard for Pumpkin. She just seems out of it (for lack of a better way to describe things). She can't seem to communicate as well. She's not as mobile as she wants to be. And she misses her mommy. So, most of the day, I heard the usual babble/moan sounds that she makes normally mixed in with lots of cries for Mommy. Then, as she seemed to get more and more tired (from the meds???) she would just cry.
We're still newbies when it comes to fostering. This is the first placement we've had where the child even asked for mommy. Our little Jordan that we cared for in Iowa (18 month old boy) was probably a RAD baby as he withdrew so deep inside himself instead of expressing much emotion. Our girls MissArguePants and TurtleTurtle had been moved so many times, and their abuse was so severe, they didn't know WHO they wanted. But little Pumpkin wants her mommy.
This is difficult for me for a couple different reasons. One - it just breaks my heart. I want to comfort her but she just wants her mommy. Two - the developmental delay makes it impossible for us to discuss what is happening. She just doesn't understand. It's like I'm taking care of a 40 pound infant.
How do you seasoned foster mammas handle things like this? I'm not sure I can personally tolerate crying all day long. Of course I want to be sympathetic. But, being totally honest here, I just might go crazy if a non-communicative child simply cries all day. It's not the same as a baby. I can't put her in a sling, or a swing, or a bouncer. I don't know what to do to make it better. I never know when to sit with her and try to comfort and when to go on about my business.
For now, if she's saying "Mommy", I try to stay with her. I want to make sure she knows she's not alone. But if she seems to just be crying for the sake of crying, I'm not sure what to do. I'm toying with the idea of a rug, or a place I can put her when it seems like she's choosing to cry instead of communicate. Is that too harsh???? She possesses the ability to talk some. And I know the seizure meds make her in more of a fog. But it's still not OK for her to cry all the time.
But then again, it IS OK for her to cry. I can't imagine what she's gone through. I feel so bad for her right now. Advice please??????