I'm thinking I'm going to have to do another round of behavior mod on myself. I'm getting triggered just a little too easily.
Tonight at supper, Pumpkin fed herself. THIS is a good thing! When she was done, she actually said, "all done". It took us over four months to teach Pumpkin this skill. But...she learned it. She can spontaneously tell us whether or not she wants "more" or if she is "all done". Not only did she learn the words, but she can sign them as well. This is wonderful progress and should have made me feel good.
After I got the table cleared up though, I wanted to cut Pumpkin's finger nails. They are too long and she's a picker. In fact, she picked a sore on her leg until it bled during occupational therapy today.
Anyway, I sat down with the finger nail clippers over by my desk and told Pumpkin to "come here". She got up from her toys and started to walk over to me. She came into the corner of the room where I was. I used physical prompting and told her several times to come over to me. But, because this is so out of the norm of her daily routine she did. not. understand. me.
She just stood there. Confused.
I got triggered.
I got up, took Pumpkin by the arm and walked her over to my desk. She was confused. She was crying.
Then I sniffed.
I checked her diaper.
Now I was really triggered.
I did not have the most stellar parenting moment ever.
I think I'm going to have to break out the stickers again. I've got to get my own behaviors under control. By next Friday I'm going to be doing this all day every day without a break. As much as I can't wait to have my cherubs home with me this summer...I'm a little nervous about the amount of care Pumpkin is going to require and what that's going to look like.
Hopefully the stickers -- and the margaritas -- will help. :)