I think it is important to keep my role straight in the lives of my foster children. Yes, I am a mommy. However, I am not THEIR "Mommy". These children are going to be in my home temporarily. It is not my goal to diminish the other relationships they have. And since my own kids usually refer to me as "Mom", I try to keep the name Mommy reserved for their Mommies.
I call myself Mamma L***. In fact, every kid in the neighborhood calls me Mamma L***.
The conversations usually go like this...
Dolly: "My mommy bye bye."
Me: "Yes baby. Your mommy is bye bye. You miss her. It is sad. But Mamma L*** will take care of you and keep you safe."
So the other day Dude said something to me. I don't remember the entire conversation but it ended with me reassuring him that I am, in fact, HIS Mamma L***.
Dolly looked over at me and said, "No! You not Mamma L***. You MY MOMMY!"
All I had the emotional energy for was a quick response of, "Yes. I'm your Mamma L***".