Sunday, December 18, 2011

Who should get what?

I take pictures of Pumpkin and pass them on to her mom periodically. We're down to having visits only once a month for one hour in our county so contact is rather limited. (The almost nonexistent visits are a "county" thing that applies to almost every child in our area. It's not because of any details specific to Pumpkin's case.) I don't do pictures at every visit like some people do. Pumpkin is 6 years old so she's not changing as fast as a baby does. But I've given Mom some snapshots. I gave her a framed photo on Mother's Day. And I made a photo book when Pumpkin left care back in September.

Anyway, I'd like your opinion...

When I get something from the school (like a picture her teacher gave her for Christmas of her classmates), should I give it to Mom? Or, because this case is moving towards termination, should I save things like that for the person that will ultimately end up caring for Pumpkin when she leaves foster care?

7 comments:

Mitzy said...

If I were Pumpkin's Mom I would want any and all photos etc. of my daughter. If I were Pumpkin's future Parent or caregiver I would want any and all photos of Pumpkin.

What about copies for Pumpkin's Mom and you hold on to the originals for Pumpkin's future?

Acceptance with Joy said...

scan and make copies. This is important. The little ones we adopted came with no pictures. It's so sad to be missing their milestones.

Mama P said...

I agree with making copies...even if it is just onto cardstock paper, to send to her mom when you can, but I would send the originals with the adoptive parents. I say that as an adoptive parent, but the photos going with them are not so much for the parents, but for themselves.

When my two we are adopting are young men, they won't have baby photos like my bio son will. ANY thing we could get for them would be a gift.

Mary said...

Make copies- it's a win-win situation for everyone!

MamaFoster said...

i would save them and send them with her where ever she goes...if you want to make copies make copies...if you don't...well, that is the lady that got her kid back and then immediately got her taken away again...

Mie said...

It's especially hard when you don't know where the case is going for sure.

I never send anything home that's identifying - pictures of the school and class are what gets me here. If it has their logo all over it or other kids are pictured, I don't send it home. I do send home other pieces of artwork or homework that I ordinarily wouldn't keep as a parent myself. Things I would keep as a parent I save in an expandable folder by month. Then, whatever happens this stuff goes with them. If they stay with me I already have it organized. If they go home or to a kinship placement I just send it along.

Mie said...

It's especially hard when you don't know where the case is going for sure.

I never send anything home that's identifying - pictures of the school and class are what gets me here. If it has their logo all over it or other kids are pictured, I don't send it home. I do send home other pieces of artwork or homework that I ordinarily wouldn't keep as a parent myself. Things I would keep as a parent I save in an expandable folder by month. Then, whatever happens this stuff goes with them. If they stay with me I already have it organized. If they go home or to a kinship placement I just send it along.