Friday, January 6, 2012

Gotta talk about something positive

I feel like all I've been doing lately is complaining about The System. So I thought I'd post something more positive today.

When Dude came to my home back in June he was 2 1/2 years old (almost to the day). He was in diapers. Included in the tiny amount of clothes that were in his suitcase, there were two pair of underwear. These underwear were not brand new. I thought that maybe, just maybe, Dude had been potty trained at some point in time.

Removal from all that you know is traumatic though. Especially when you're placed into a home that doesn't speak your native language. This kind of trauma often causes regression – especially with things like potty training. I didn't even bother trying to get Dude to wear underwear. I left him in diapers. I was too busy that first month trying to hang on through all the extreme fatigue because of the sleeping issues at night to even think about working on potty training.

I did give Dude the opportunity to use the potty pretty regularly (maybe once a day or so I guess). He seemed familiar with it. He went every time I put him up on it. But he rarely asked to sit on the potty all on his own.

When we came back from our vacation in August, I was ready to tackle the potty "officially". I had borrowed a bunch of training pants from my sister when I was home. (I'm not a fan of pull-ups.) I waited until we were back in routine. Since Dude & Dolly hadn't been allowed to go on vacation with us it took awhile to get back into the swing of things. But I picked a day and we went for it.

Dude peed all over the place all day long.

That afternoon CPS called and scheduled a family visit for the very next day.

When I potty train I like to keep my kids home and close to a potty all day long. I like to do little more than work on potty training for at least a week (preferably two). A family visit on day two of training was going to really mess things up. As quickly as I started potty training – I gave up! Dude wasn't even 3 years old yet. He was probably going to be moved out of my house. It wasn't worth the hassle for me. I was just going to keep him in diapers. To heck with it.

I kept on putting Dude on the potty. Maybe every day. But not on any kind of a schedule or anything.

The only thing I began to expect out of Dude was for him to tell me when he went ca-ca. Honestly, with all the issues I have changing Pumpkin's diapers, I could not handle two kids pooping and sitting in it without telling me. Besides, Dude was FULLY aware of when he had gone ca-ca. So asking him to tell me so I could get him changed right away was not an unrealistic expectation.

Well, Dude didn't want to cooperate. In fact, it was almost like he was pooping and not telling me on purpose just to see what I'd do.

I'm not sure what my issues with other kid's poop is – but it REALLY bothered me. I made it through one weekend and decided that come Monday morning, things were going to change.

I decided I was going to potty train the way I had trained all three of my boys. Naked. Naked from the waist down. Rules be damned. (I'm sure CPS would not approve of me letting my little guy run around naked all day long.) But it's how I trained before. It worked before. And it was what I was going to do again.

So Dude went naked. I pretty much told Dude that he had to learn how to use the potty because he had stopped telling me when we was poopy. He didn't seem to mind. I'm pretty sure he understood. And day one, I think he only had one accident.

Day two we got up and I put clothes on Dude. I had to get him dressed to take the other kids to school. When we got back from drop-off I started to strip him down. He freaked out! He did NOT want to go naked again!!!

I told Dude he could wear clothes until he peed in them. If he peed in his clothes he had to go naked. He understood. And later that morning, when he peed all over his pants, he didn't fight me when I stripped him down.

That afternoon I let Dude put on a pair of underwear. I believe he only had one tiny accident but this time he stopped himself before peeing all over the place and took himself into the bathroom.

By the end of the week, Dude was fully dressed and not having any accidents.

Approximately two weeks later we went to Sea World and he stayed dry the entire time. In fact, I think after those first couple days, the only accident Dude has had was on a day when he was particularly tired because he hadn't napped the day before.

Boy did I get lucky!!!

I'm back to changing diapers on only one kid. Yippeeee!!!


MamaFoster said...

that's good. glad it worked out!

Meg0422 said...

I wish I could have done it your way! But, alas, I had to bribe him with mini M&Ms. Not the way I'd like to, but he's not the type to fuss if he didn't get them and he often forgot about them.

Now if he'd only hit the water every time....

Jessi said...

That's awesome! I've heard others say the naked for a couple days works great! ha.