Monday, September 17, 2012

Where did he sleep?


I don't want to pry.

OK. That's a lie!! I really, really, really want to pry! I really, really, really want to know everything that happened with Dude and Dolly over the weekend.

But they are so little. I pretty much have to wait for them to volunteer up the information.

If applicable though, I can ask a few questions without freaking them out.

Dude informed me he wanted cereal for breakfast this morning. Dude loves cereal for breakfast! I asked him if his grandma gave him cereal. He smiled and said no, she gave him a tortilla and egg. It was a brief conversation but it let Dude know that I'm interested in what he did. No judgement! I'm just interested.

I couldn't help myself though with Dolly. I asked her if her Papi J slept at Grandma's house or if he slept somewhere else.

She said he slept at Grandma's.

I smiled and said, "Oh, so you got to see him first thing in the morning."

She said, "Yes. And then we went to the park."

Papi J has not even started any services yet. Papi J was supposed to get ONE four hour visit while the children were at Grandma's house. It appears that Papi J still lives with Grandma and didn't leave like he was supposed to this past weekend.



Meg0422 said...


r. said...

I don't recall the whole backstory . . . Has Papi J been unsafe with the kids, or is it more that he didn't "earn" his access by doing services?

Sorry if that seems like a dumb question, but I know that in Texas a lot of times a CPS case starts due to something going on with the mom, and then a several months into it they get around to adding the dad (or alleged dad) as a defendant and demanding that he do services.

If it is the case that he was never abusive or negligent towards the child, isn't known to be a heavy drug user or to have a violent temper, etc., then I'm not sure it's unreasonable for him to be living with Grandma when the kids go there. Besides, Grandma would be the one getting custody, not him.

On the other hand, if he is dangerous or there are serious concerns, then I totally get your frustration and I'd hope the ad litem would do some investigation.

CherubMamma said...

Papi J has spent the past three years in prison. He just got out recently. He has had almost NO contact with the children period for years. Since coming into care the children have seen him during one supervised visit with his mother and the children at the CPS office (back in July) and then again at court last week.

Dad has a very detailed drug history!!!! He has been in and out of jail/prison since he was 17 years old I believe. He is NOT to be living with the children. This was addressed at court last week. He lied to the cherubs' lawyer and said he was living elsewhere. I explained to the lawyer that he was still living with Grandma. She was very concerned about Dad being that close to the picture.

I seriously don't know how abusive he has been to the children. I do know that when they really were babies, he kicked their mother out of the house and threw everything belonging to the babies into a dumpster.

I'm just really uncomfortable with all of this. CPS seems to think that Grandma is going to advocate for the children and their safety. But my guess is that Dad will have unlimited contact due to the fact that he is not employed and Grandma is. It bothers me but I'm not sure what to do about it.

r. said...

Gotcha. I wonder if he's on parole. Maybe the kids' lawyer could call the parole officer and see where he's told them he's living...

MamaFoster said...

that is so frustrating

Foster Mom - R said...

I'd alert the attorney and have her investigate.