Monday, May 13, 2013

Back from Dallas again

My cherubs are back from Dallas again. I was thankful for the timing of this visit. They left much earlier on Friday (10:00AM from my house) and they were home before 3:00PM on Sunday. The cherubs were much more regulated than the past few visits. They were still incredibly tired (Dude was falling asleep on Mr. Amazing's lap at 6:00PM). But they were in a much better mood compared to normal.

However, I am convinced that they have been told to keep secrets about what happens in Dallas.

I'm completely freaked out!

Dolly was going about her normal business yesterday and in conversation she told me that they went to Tio Eli's house. Dude immediately piped up and said that they did NOT got to Tio Eli's house. Dolly said they did. Dude said they didn't. Then both children completely clammed up. It was uncomfortable for me. Of course I wanted to continue to press them for information. But the way they shut down made it clear that I shouldn't.

This morning on the way to drop Dude off at school, TT made conversation with Dolly about this weekend. As cheerfully as I could I said, "They did a lot of stuff this weekend. They went to a party. They went over to someone's house to get dresses for a cousin. And they went to Tio Eli's house."

Dude immediately said, "We didn't go to Tio Eli's house."

Dolly is such a pleaser. She didn't know what to do. It was all over her face!!! She wanted to keep the secret. Yet she wanted to agree with me.

I dropped it.

When I opened the door to get Dude out I picked him up instead of putting him down to walk. He grabbed hold hard and buried his head in my shoulder. I walked away from the car and hugged him tight. As we got up to the school I told him he looked scared – or sad. He buried his head in my shoulder again.

I held him. I told him he's not in trouble. I told him he was safe.

Then I asked him if something scared him in Dallas.

He said yes.

I asked him if someone told him to keep a secret.

He nodded yes.

I asked him, "Who?"

He clammed up tight and then mumbled, "Me."


I didn't know what to do. I dropped it after reminding him that he is safe and he's not in trouble. I took his teacher aside and told her what had just happened. I said that if he does share anything about where he went this weekend it's important information for me to have. I also need to know badly if he acts up in school this week. I have to document everything.


G said...

Oh, we had this. Younger child talked about seeing someone with whom the children were specifically not to have contact and older child swooped in and insisted younger one was confused and mixing up last visit with time before care. (Over a year ago? by a 3 year old? Sure.) And later older child confessed Mommy had told them not to tell me certain things because, if they told me, they wouldn't get to come home.

Heartbreaking. (I documented, they went anyway, and were back in care within a few months.)

MamaFoster said...