Wednesday, January 15, 2014

Daisy has started therapies

So far this week Daisy has seen the physical therapist for an initial evaluation and both occupational and speech therapy for treatment. Per all three therapists, Daisy is functioning around the developmental age of 2-3 months. Chronologically, Daisy is 8 months old. When you're an infant, this level of delay is rather significant.

PT and OT will look a lot alike. Goals for both disciplines include things like tolerating touch, moving into position to crawl and things like that.

Speech (ST) also has goals of tolerating touch. The therapist will manipulate Daisy's mouth and tongue helping train the muscles for movements needed for eating and speech. Also, the speech therapist will assist with feeding to make sure that Daisy is eating correctly (physically speaking that is) and that she's not having aspiration issues.

I know all of this. I'm Daisy's primary caregiver and I've dealt with therapies before. I recognize that the general public might not understand what an infant would do in PT, OT and ST. But I would hope that her caseworker would educate herself on it and then pass along the knowledge to the bio family. After all, Daisy is also under the care of CPS too. Granted, I meet her day to day needs. But CPS communicates to the judge what Daisy's needs are. She needs these therapies. They should understand why!!

I'm getting a bit tired of communicating new health information to the bio family. I'm sure I just need to get over it. But I'm worried that if CPS isn't communicating things to the MOM what are they going to tell the JUDGE?!

At Daisy's visit tonight Bio Mom asked me how Daisy's appointment at the retina specialist went. There isn't much to say. I told Bio Mom that we know Daisy can see light. But anything other than that is a guess. There are too many variables at stake to know how much Daisy is going to recover.

I then added, "Daisy started her therapies this week. She's seen the occupational and speech therapists."

Daisy's mom's look of surprise caught me off guard. She needed me to explain why Daisy needs therapies. I told her it's to help her recover. I told Bio Mom it will help Daisy learn to walk, talk and will assist with any feeding issues.

Bio Mom got a look of alarm and said, "There aren't any problems are there?!" (In her defense, she was specifically relating this question to feeding issues.)

Keeping my frustration to myself I had to respond, "Well...Daisy is only functioning like that of a 2-3 month old child. She can't do all the things she's supposed to be able to do right now. No, I'm not seeing any feeding issues per se. But the therapist will be able to make sure and help as we go along." I kept it simple. I decided it wasn't a good time to talk about silent aspiration or any of the other problems that could develop.

I was frustrated though. Daisy should be getting ready to eat chunky food. Daisy would be able to start eating Cheerios and other small bites within a month or so if she hadn't been hurt. But as it is now, she barely is able to eat Stage 1 foods and even then she tires easily. Sitting upright and eating food is hard work for her. Bio Mom should have already known this.

I'm scared that CPS isn't fully aware of what's happened to Daisy. I'm scared Daisy is going to languish in Care because no one knows anything. I don't like being the one to tell the bio family everything about Daisy. I'm not going to be rude. I'll answer questions. But there is a criminal case pending and I don't want to say anything to compromise that either.

I'm also scared of the nonchalant way that Bio Mom cradled Daisy and cooed at her, "You're going to get all better," in such a way that it seriously sounded like she isn't acknowledging how badly Daisy got hurt. She sounded like a mom comforting a kid with a skinned knee.

I honestly don't want to read too much in to what I hear from Bio Mom. But since I've got very little contact with CPS, the lawyer has never contacted me and I'm the only one telling the bio family about the medical details - I'm uncomfortable.

Foster care sucks.

2 comments:

Vertical Mom said...

Can you reach out to the GAL yourself and inform him/her what's going on?

Cherub Mamma said...

Yes, I will be in contact with the AAL/GAL before the next court hearing. But I know they won't reach out to me. I will have to contact them for sure.