Mr. CW (our CPS worker for Daisy) was very busy yesterday doing a removal and then subsequent placement of five children. That explains the limited information and inability to answer all of my questions. The man was swamped!
He's working on Daisy's court report right now though. He needed a couple of simple questions answered and he called me this afternoon.
I answered his questions and then said, "So, what's the deal with tomorrow?" (the Family Group Conference)
He answered, "Oh...yeah...I owe you that one."
Then he explained and I breathed a huge sigh of relief!!!
Long story short...Bio Mom is in such a state of denial that she simply cannot believe that her child was injured at the hands of her significant other. She also refuses to believe that Daisy belongs in foster care. She wants Daisy returned.
Bio Mom is in denial. She's not the brightest bulb on the tree as a result of that incredible denial. But Bio Mom is a high functioning adult. And Bio Mom formally requested an administrative review of Daisy's case.
The administrative review happened. It is black and white! Daisy was injured at the hands of a biological parent and therefore cannot be returned at this time! CPS is not wavering in its position in this case at all. They aren't turning a blind eye to the reality of what was done to Daisy.
However, this whole process burdens CPS with more "work". They have to prove themselves again. AND they have to explain to Bio Mom (and Bio Dad if he shows) why they were justified in removing Daisy from their care.
Thus the Family Group Conference tomorrow.
It is simply (ha ha) going to be a big, long, formal meeting where we lay everything out on the table again. I've been to a few of these and yes, I will be allowed to talk. I will discuss in great length all the developmental delays that Daisy struggles with as a result of her injuries.
My biggest fear was that CPS was moving closer toward reunification and that was why the meeting was being called. I was wrong! They are continuing to err on the side of caution as much as they legally can. For that I am grateful.
I'm still not looking forward to the meeting at all. I still DO NOT want to face Bio Dad. I especially don't want to face that man while holding the child he nearly killed in my arms.
But at least I don't have to worry about CPS making light of the situation. That is not the purpose of this meeting at all. Instead, it's going to be a room full of people that feel as I do about Daisy's need for safety. First we'll go over the family's strengths. Then we'll go over the weaknesses. Then they will set goals for the family. I'm pretty sure I can handle that since I know CPS isn't going to be trying to contradict anything I say.
Please continue to pray for me. I survived the last 24 hours on those prayers you guys sent up on our behalf. I'm nervous about meeting Bio Dad. Even though I'm relieved now that I know the WHY behind this meeting, it still doesn't take away my belief that the baby should not have to attend.
Several people have mentioned on the last blog post and my FB page that I should "wear" Daisy to the meeting.
I do wear her some. I've got a ring sling and a soft-structured carrier that I use. Unfortunately, I don't think either one will work for this meeting. Daisy resists STRONGLY the ring sling. My Genius Sister says it's because of the sling itself. I'm not an expert in baby wearing so I have to trust her on that one. But I simply cannot get Miss Floppy Baby situated in the ring sling at all. And then for both carriers, Miss Daisy complains when I've got her in one and I sit down. She'll let me wear her for hours if I'm standing up. But if I sit down when I've got Daisy on my front or my back she gets super fussy. I really don't want to stand for the entire meeting either.
I trust Mr. CW that I'm to be the one holding Miss Daisy. I will try to position myself in the meeting so that I've got the baby and it's clear she's to be with me. Hopefully I'll be sitting opposite the table from the bio family and they won't have an opportunity to take the baby from me.
But really, I'm just going to pray that Bio Dad doesn't show up. As horrible as that may sound, that's my prayer.