Thursday, April 24, 2014

We went to the neurosurgeon again today

Bio Mom ended up being a no-show at the neurosurgeon this morning. Bio Mom knew about the appointment. She was there when it was assigned last week. Today is also her day off at work. I don't know why she didn't show up. But attending medical appointments is something that is simply allowed. Bio Mom is not required to attend.

Daisy is scheduled to have a visit this afternoon. I'm not going to bring up the fact Bio Mom was a no-show this morning though. I'm keeping my interactions with Bio Mom to a bare minimum. She's made it clear to all the people in power that she wants her baby back. Mr. CW used the word "hostile" when he described how she's interacting with CPS. I will give her NO ammunition against me.

I did get some interesting information at the doctor's office this morning though. It seems that last week, after Daisy and I pulled out of the parking lot, Bio Mom went back into the doctor's office to speak to him alone.

My initial reaction to that was one of extreme disappointment. This doctor, the neurosurgeon, is the one that continually tells me that Daisy is going to be "just fine". Over and over that's all he seems to say. I was afraid that this doctor helped shove Bio Mom deeper into her denial.

The neurosurgeon came into the exam room and cautiously asked me if Daisy was going to go back to Bio Mom. I smiled and said I don't know what's going to happen. Then I told him I knew she came to talk to him in private last week. He told me that Bio Mom wanted to know "how to care for her baby".

I told the neurosurgeon, briefly, that I thought Bio Mom was trying to find out if her daughter was going to fully recover from her injuries. I indicated that Bio Mom is in extreme denial about the severity of the damage done.

The neurosurgeon looked at me and said, "I'm not in a position to talk to her about that."

I said, "Yes you are. You've seen the MRIs. You know about the amount of permanent brain damage Daisy has."

He softened a bit and said, "Yes." But he went on to say that's not what Bio Mom wanted to know. Instead, she was trying to figure out if she needed to do things on a day to day basis differently. I think his words were, "Bio Mom wanted to know what she needed to do to prevent further brain damage."


My Genius Sister decoded all of that for me. She's soooo smart.

Of course Bio Mom wants to know how to prevent future brain damage. She's still convinced that Daisy simply suffered from an accident. Bio Mom wants to know how to prevent that kind of accident from happening again.



I broke about a zillion rules and spoke with two of the nurses before I left today. One of them said something about praying for Daisy and hoping she ends up where she's supposed to be. I could tell they sympathized with Bio Mom a bit. I mean...Bio Mom did come back in to try and learn more about her baby. (Bio Mom looks good on paper I tell you.)

I couldn't help myself though. When one of the nurses asked me about Bio Dad I said, "He's not a long-term concern in this case. CPS is not trying to place Daisy with him in any way." The nurses looked relieved. I added that he will have a criminal trial too. Then I said, "But the real problem in everything is Bio Mom is still with Bio Dad."

The nurses just shook their heads in disgust. Any sympathy they had for Bio Mom went out the window. Now everything I had said about Bio Mom being in denial about Daisy's disabilities made sense to them.


I sent a text message to Mr. CW letting him know that Bio Mom didn't come to the appointment. He said thank you for letting him know and that was that.

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