Saturday, May 16, 2015

the process of adoption through foster care

I think I've answered most of the other questions people asked when I put out the request for blog topics. This is the last one. A reader wants to know about the process of adoption through foster care. Specifically, when family has expressed interest, but not until adoption comes up.

I don't want to leave this reader hanging...but I really don't have much experience with this topic. The adoption of TT was anything but typical and the process was different from anyone else I've ever read about that adopted through foster care. TT's parents chose adoption for him by signing their rights away at the hospital. But they didn't go through an adoption agency or make any legal plans ahead of TT's birth so it went through the foster care system. We had to hire a lawyer and it functioned sort of like a domestic adoption with cheaper legal fees for us.

The process of adopting through foster care is also different if you're adopting a waiting child (one whose parents' rights have already been terminated). Last Mom and her husband adopted an older child and she writes about the experience with their daughter, Princess, on her blog.

As for fostering, and waiting for rights to be terminated, and then adopting because no family can be found...that seems to work differently for every single case. In some cases, TPR (Termination of Parental Rights) happens quickly. Some, like Rebecca at Fosterhood, wait for years just for the full TPR hearing to happen.

Readers...if you blog about foster care and adopting through The System...can you help me out? Please comment with a link to your blog. As comments come in, I'll also put links up on my FB page so people can click through and read your story.

Thank you!!


Anonymous said...

Thank you for finding time to post so frequently and for answering questions and sharing your knowledge. To keep you going: what is Ricky planning for the next year? What new skills is Russell learning and working on. (This hopefully helps you see the HUGE progress he has made since his arrival at your home.) What are the major themes you plan on for the next 4 months of homeschool...... or activities TT&Bart will focus on for summer. How do you manage living in your climate in the summer. (I particularly wonder as just prior to WWII my parents lived there and there was no a/c and there were LOTS of .... insects with no controls. My mother, from the Pacific NW, was not entranced.)

G said...

We adopted from foster care, with a child that was initially a foster placement, although I don't feel like our experience was typical either....

Then again, maybe one of the problems with foster care is that there is no "typical." :)

Anyway, I'm at

Anonymous said...

on Fbk you indicated you want to hold space open in your home in case the sisters move from the their current relative's placement. I believe at first you were unsure about all three at once from the start. How has that changed now that Russell is more of a fixture in your home? Is that in part because he is easy and now in routine or ???? Thank you.
You are always interesting. And your patience under pressure with appointments changing in time at the last minute is VERY impressive!

Jessica Miller Kelley said...

We've been fostering a little girl for almost two years now who will soon go to her pre-adoptive parents. We have had her so long even though we have no intention to adopt because everybody thought reunification would/might be possible, but after her bio parents' alcohol/drug relapses, disappearing for months on end, etc., they finally took reunification off the plan and started working on TPR and looking for a pre-adoptive home. That paperwork seemed to sit somewhere forever without being filed, then there were two pre-adoptive families that met her but decided not to take her. About that time, her day care teacher announced that she and her husband wanted to adopt her! At first, DCS said since they had a prior relationship with her, it would be a kinship placement and they could move her right away, they backtracked on that suddenly and said they couldn't take her until they'd been fully certified as foster parents. 4-5 months later, that's about to happen! She'll have to be in their home six months before they can adopt her, though--oh, and TPR still hasn't happened. The trial got postponed...? Things take forever, but permanency for her seems to be getting closer!

Jessica Miller Kelley said...

Oh, and I want to say how much I appreciate your honesty about Pumpkin's story you shared recently. It reminded me of our situation, and helped me feel less guilty about how I've been feeling.