Monday, March 28, 2016

praying for Bopper

Bopper is a young thing. I know she's not fresh out of school – she has been with CPS for several years now. But she's still quite young. (Thus the blog name "Bopper"...as in Teeny Bopper.)

Bopper is also VERY VERY VERY soft spoken. She admits to being scared of everyone and everything. Even she finds it ironic that she's in this line of work. She's sweet and quiet and reminds me of a church mouse.

I need Bopper to be the exact opposite of that tomorrow.

You see, Bopper has a meeting with her supervisor tomorrow to "staff this case". That means her supervisor takes time to have a sit-down meeting with Bopper to go over important details concerning these kids. She is to give him details and they work together to decide what should happen next.

I'd like to think that he always has his hands on this case. I'd like to think that the supervisor knows what's going on. But that's not realistic. So these "staffings" are held and that's where Bopper catches him up.

And tomorrow, Bopper has to go over the most recent visits and things that have happened with Russell's grandparents. She has to bring valid concerns to her supervisor's attention. She needs to be able to speak strongly and she needs to convey a real opinion about what she thinks should happen and how this case should move forward.

I'm praying that Bopper grows a set and is more opinionated and stronger tomorrow than I've ever seen her before.

You see, some things happened last Wednesday with the grandparents when they were in my home for their visit with the babies that concerned me. On the surface they might seem minor. But if you look at them seriously and factor in that Russell has severe special needs - and will have severe special needs for the rest of his life - the situation isn't really minor at all. Not only did they concern me, but they concerned the visit supervisor as well. I know the monitor took notes and reported everything. I called Bopper to talk to her about them myself. I told Bopper what happened and strongly suggested that she get a copy of the visit notes soon.

And yes, I'm being vague. I'm not going to open my blog up as a place to bash on the family of origin. Because if everything is determined by the State that Russell and Star be placed with the grandparents, I'm going to comply and I will continue to work with the grandparents as much as I can to make the transition a healthy one for everyone involved. The children were safe in my home. But based on what happened, there are new concerns about the long-term viability of the babies being placed with the grandparents.

I've been praying all weekend for Bopper and I'm going to focus my prayers on her as this case moves forward. She always tells me what happens in these staffings. I can tell that her supervisor is rather cut and dry and he wants Bopper to be more that way herself. I know that Bopper doesn't want these children placed with the grandparents for many reasons (ones that were presented in the home study that they failed plus the new concerns that have been brought to light). What I don't want to have happen is for Bopper to present her concerns to her supervisor in a wishy-washy way. I want her to be direct and concise. From there, I hope that CPS can develop a plan that is viable that will keep Russell and Star safe.

If this plan is for the children to be placed with the grandparents, I want them to develop a timeline and make it happen. If the plan is to abandon the idea of placement with the grandparents, I want them to come up with a viable alternative.

What I don't want to have happen is for CPS to simply drag this case out as long as possible. And sadly, Bopper has told me specifically that that is what she wants to do for now. I realize that Bopper thinks dragging the case out keeps Russell safe in our home. But it's not healthy for cases to get drug out for a long time. Either the grandparents are an option for permanent placement or they aren't. I don't do well living in limbo forever. I'm here for the babies as long as they need me. But I don't believe that long-term foster care is good for anyone if there isn't progress being made in the case. I believe that my family deserves some finality too. Again, I have no problem being a resource and having the children in my home when progress is being made. But right now, people need to determine if the grandparents are an option or not. Don't just keep the kids in foster care because you don't want to deal with any other solution.

Bopper says her meeting with her supervisor is tomorrow (if he doesn't reschedule it). I'm praying for Bopper. Will you join me in that prayer? And yes, as soon as I hear anything, I'll let y'all know what is decided. We don't go to court again until May, but a million things could happen between now and then. This is foster care after all. And foster care sucks.

3 comments:

Kathy of the HavinsNest said...

Definitely praying.

Emily said...

Yes, yes, yes! I will be praying for Bopper. For the ability to communicate strongly, for courage, for boldness. Looking forward to your next update.

abrianna said...

Agreeing with you in prayer.